Iboku Uruan, Ubium Day: How ‘Ukapadisua’ Unfolded in Akwa Ibom | Ibom Heritage

Ukapadisua 2023 for us saw us show up at Iboku Uruan and Ikot Akpan Abia Ubium Day. For those who don’t understand, Ukapadisua is the Ibibio term for the yuletide season. In this article, we present the remarkable Akwa Ibom cultural season that December 2022 to January 2023 became for Ibom Heritage. The two events highlighted, are by no means the only ones that held across the land.

The Festive months of December/January typically register diverse forms of jubilation and celebration of different magnitudes across board. Cultural events are top of the line in most societies and environments during this time. In a similar vein, Ibom Heritage Preservation Organization had earmarked the period to witness and curate some more values and heritage of Ibom people. We set out to capture in images, culture that truly distinguishes Akwa Ibom people. The Organization had designated different outings within this period to attend, witness and capture. Our aim was to preserve remarkable cultural legacies.

Iboku Uruan

The most significant ceremony of the season for us was also our flagship partnership with Uruan people; Iboku Uruan Cultural Festival 2022. It held at Mbiaya Uruan Primary School Ground on the 28th of December. This is an annual gathering of the Akpe/Iboku Etongko Mkpe Uruan Heritage Foundation of the Uruan Clan. It is held to promote the awareness of the cultural heritage of the Uruan people as a whole.

Highly esteemed dignitaries, lovers, sponsors of Culture and Tourism attended Iboku Uruan from far and near. The major focus of the event was on a showcase of different Ekpe ensembles. It was a very rare display of the Ekpe culture in their diverse glories.

The Ekpe cult has its masquerade of the same name.  It is rooted in the Efik culture of the Ibibio people. [See Oto-Obong Uwah’s book; “Ibibio Nation: History and Culture” for more]. The Efiks parade Ekpe with such majesty and splendour. This was the treatment the gave us at Iboku Uruan.  It was truly remarkable to behold;  colourful, exhilarating, and awe-inspiring. The Nyoro Ekpe, Abang, Ekombi, Adiadia among others all made appearances to make the day an unforgettably rich cultural exhibition. See our gallery.

Ekombi Dance

One of the most vividly inspiring memories of the day was of the Ekombi Dancers. Their appearance preceded the outing of the various Ekpe Masquerades. Their display accentuated the beauty and elegance associated with the African woman. They had costumes that were eye-catching and strikingly colourful while their accessories were in total sync with their outfits. They wore combs, necklaces, mirrors, typical amazing Efik cultural garb, among others.

Their flamboyant hairstyles also caught the eye. They had a rich spin to the ceremonial hairdos richly complementing their exotic costumes and tattoos. Ekombi dance is inspired by the waves of the sea. According to historians, Ekombi dance came from the coastal fishing tribes of the Ibibios. The dance usually gestures the hand parting of oceans and seas. It perfectly blends with the unique percussive rhythm supplied by the Ekpe group drummers. As the maidens wind about, you see the energetic twirl as they gyrate with a smile on their faces giving away the gracefulness of the Efik art of Uruan people.

Historically, this dance presented attractive damsels ready for entertained suitors. In present day, it is nothing but entertainment, although on-lookers cannot help but note the attractiveness of the art along with the artists. Yes, you cannot miss their poise.

Ubium Day

Ikot Akpan Abia Ubium is a small community in Nsit Ubium Local Government Area. It borders with Ibesikpo. On the 26th of December, Ibom Heritage Preservation Organization was at Ikot Akpan Abia for the Ikot Akpan Abia-Ubium Development Forum Day. It was a celebration of the reunion of illustrious Sons, Daughters and other indigenes of the Community Their aim for this was to foster a sense of belonging for their community members and to enhance the quality of life and well-being of the society. In the event, they gave awards, local ballad presentations, rendered dance, music and lectures.

Notable plays on the day were The Akaba (Nka Akparawa) with their ‘Atayad’ performances. It set the tempo for the unveiling of ‘Ekpo Taab ’. This is a revered masquerade in those parts. Ibom Heritage Preservation Organization is delighted to have been a part of that grand day.

Ekóng Festival

We were at Eket to witness the Ekóng Festival of January 1, 2023. Although we did not acquire original images at the crowning the festive period, we still have a few in our Gallery. This was a spectacle of cultural glamour as indigenes and tourists came out en-masse to see what they seldom see in the Ekóng Esit Urua Masquerades.

These masquerades were in between scary and cute. They came out covered in pitch black charcoal armed with bows and arrows and their entourage spewing local gin reciting incantations, dancing, skipping, pausing and then resuming all over. Their cutlasses would clash as they chanted and sang in rhythm. In one instance, one of the figureheads of the Masqueraders ran to the Centre of the Market and dipped his head into a basin of concoctions. He then raised it to make contact with the other Ekóng masquerades. This was accompanied by a unison chorus of ‘Ekid, Ekid, Ekid’. The significance of that action was to portray unity among Eket people. Ekóng Society Elders’ initiates were also on ground to uphold and reinforce the esoteric traditional rites that make the group distinct.

Conclusion

No doubts, Ibom Heritage Preservation Organization had a fascinating festive season in covering these events that promote the cultural values and renaissance of the people and the Organization will be taking this enthusiasm into 2023 with many special activities lined up. We urge you to stay promoting and preserving the cultural heritage of all Ibom people.

Ibom Heritage Preservation Organization was present as partners and also to collect visuals from this event.  Visit our Social Media Channels to see some photos and videos; also our gallery.

Usen Ndia – The Uyo Food Festival | Ibom Heritage

Usen Ndia – ‘Uyo Food Festival’ – is an Annual culinary initiative that holds in Uyo. It was begun in 2018 with the primary aim of presenting and promoting to the general public the diverse local food delicacies and drinks native to Nigerians but with particular emphasis on those from the Akwa Ibom/Cross River Culture. The event also seeks to organise, encourage and support entrepreneurial drive among aspiring and seasoned chefs. All this while affording them the opportunity to position themselves  in the catering landscape.

The fair is a ticketed event that typically witnesses a huge turnout yearly. But it also sees different vendors display their culinary skills and diverse strengths. The array of indigenous meals and foods is usually fascinating.

Food Displays

The delicacies served at Usen Ndia include: Ekpañg Nkukwó, Iwà ye Eben, Usüñg Ikpóñg, Asiak Iwà, Isip Eyöp, Añem Udia, Efere Afañg, Edikañ Ikóñg, Nkóp, Edesi Adañ, Iwük Ukóm, Ukód Nsúñg among many others.

Beyond the display of Food recipes aimed at blending a wide range of indigenous foods, there are other side-attractions in the series. These provide entertainment such as: Traditional Dances and music, Binge Eating, Dancing Contests, Comedy among others. These add to making the Food-Tourism event a huge attraction.

Feedbacks

One attendee at the 2022 edition, Mr. Patrick Tom mentioned how enthused he gets by the large number of vendors and guests. He stated that he is equally ‘impressed by the delicacies on offer.  especially the type which are not readily available in restaurants’ and termed it a ‘richly rewarding experience’.

The Event Host, Mrs. Patricia Essien was very particular about “commitment to make the Event’s legacy an enduring one”. This according to her is “one of the motivating factors in her continued sustenance of the Program”.

Ibom Heritage is an avid promoter and preserver of cultural heritage and gladly parttner with Usen Ndia. And it goes without saying that the organisation will continue to curate the culinary culture from the yearly catering fair.

The Ibom Heritage Masquerade Forum on Twitter | Report

Thursday the 11th of November 2022 was yet another chapter for Ibom Heritage Preservation Organisation. A Forum was hosted by the organisation with focus on ‘Masquerades and their influence on Culture’. This was chosen to deeply examine in detail the history, appearances, significance and relevance of the Masquerades in Nigeria.

To that effect, a Twitter Space was promoted and hosted and there was interest from far and wide. Participants contributed their ideas, recalled their experiences and provided insights on ways to sustain the culture of Masquerades. Parallels were drawn with Colonial Festivities and the manner which Europe and even parts of South America/India still maintain and celebrate a wide range of their heritage in that regards.It is widely known that Masquerades play a symbolic role in the formation of traditional institutions especially in Sub-Saharan Africa. The Organisation sough to bring it home for participants to tell their stories, recount their experiences with Masquerades and suggest ways of preserving same for upcoming generations, especially in today’s constantly evolving society. There was special emphasis on the Ekpe, Ekpo and Eyo Masquerades and practically every relevant information on these Masquerades was dissected . At the end of each Speaker’s time, there were intervals for questions, comments and contributions.

One of the participants Mr. Mfonobong Inyang alluded that Celebrities in society have a huge role to disabuse the minds of people who are scared by erroneously held beliefs about Masquerades being diabolical. He recounted his experiences with some clergymen who demonstrated to their members that Masquerades are not ‘evil’ by joining in their dances so as to encourage people. Another participant, Dr.Jonathan, opined that awareness has to begin at the communal level and maintained that the acceptance will begin from parochial roots before they are projected to the urbanized areas of our societies. Mrs. Oyoenisai Andrew-Essien, another attendee stated that the Forum afforded her a great opportunity to correct some wrong beliefs on Masquerades and encouraged the organisation to continue in that vein.Other participants averred that were entertained and educated on the knowledge, appearances and significance of Masquerades and their relevance in our Cultural affairs. They thanked the Organisation for choosing the Topic and making their time worthwhile.

In closing, Mr Oto-Obong Uwah hinted at a future collaboration with a Movie Agency for a partnership on Netflix which will propagate the Culture of the Ibom People. This generated excitement from the participants even as they looked forward to that.There was also informatiom on the Upcoming Iboku Uruan Ekpe Festival slated for the 28th of December 2022 in Uruan. It was mentioned that Ibom Heritage will be one of the Headline sponsors involved in the event which will be attended from far and near. Participants were enjoined to attend and invite others.

The date and topic for the next forum will be announced subsequently. Kindly stay tuned for more updates on this platform.
If you missed the Twitter space, kindly catch up with the recording of the session and everything that transpired using the link provided in our Bio.

4 Curious Reasons For Divorce in Ibibio Land (Part B) | IBOM HERITAGE

We listed 4 key reasons that divorce is allowed in the Ibibio culture in a previous article (read here). In this article, we highlight 4 curious reasons Ibibio people give for divorce. They are curious because it is not common to find such reasons in many other ethnic groups. Please read on.

  • Multiple births:

It is well known that Twins were taboo in Ibibio land and also around the Southern corner of Eastern Nigeria. Back in history before Mary Slessor’s effort, twins were killed and their mother was ostracized and left to die in forests. Naturally, a divorce was enforced as a result. The Ibibios had since abandoned the practice, but it bears listing this as one reason for divorce in historical times.

  • Inability to perform sexual duties:

Unknown to the present age, there was a time when women were sent home because they could not satisfy their husband’s sexual tastes. Read more on this in Oto-Obong Uwah’s book, Ibibio Nation: History and Culture (Buy it here).  If the man was the culprit, there were cases where the woman committed adultery to be able to conceive and give birth. Back in history, the concept of adoption was not known or practiced.

  • Neglect:

A husband who neglected the wife could frustrate her enough for her to seek divorce. Hence, it was possible for a wife to divorce the husband in Ibibio culture unlike in most other African and Semite cultures. Till today, spousal neglect is still abhorred in Ibibio land.

  • Habitual cursing:

Ibibio culture outlawed foul-mouth. It was bad enough to cause marital crisis. So if either husband or wife earned the reputation of verbal abusiveness and habitual cursing out the other, the offender could be fined. And if this habit continued, the party on the receiving end could call for a divorce.

How the divorce took place

The moment a husband threw out the belongings of the wife from the hut where she stayed in, divorce had begun. He would then take her back to her father’s.

This was tough on the wife most times, because, in those days, wives had no belongings. Everything she had was her husband’s. Aniekan Nana (PhD) in his thesis (here), wrote that there are cultural and traditional practices that condition women to passivity and dependence. As a result, after a divorce, the woman was worst affected. Sent out of her home, she literally had nothing of importance left to her name. If the husband was the divorced, his family heads would be engaged to conduct the separation.

Bride Price Refunds

There is also the  issue of returning the bride price. After the wife has been returned, the bride price is to be refunded in full by her Father in law. Where the husband was the offender that led to dissolution of the marriage, the wife’s family would gladly return his dowry on their own accord.

If the wife’s family cannot come up with the dowry for refunds, it became an issue. In many families, the father of the bride would ask the divorcee to wait until the woman remarries. Then he would receive the incoming dowry and hand over to the former husband. In cases of malice, the owed husband did frustrate the wife’s family since they have become indebted to him.

There are cases where the husband refused to receive the refund out of spite to intentionally frustrate the divorced wife and her family and any remarriage plans.

For m0re on the Ibibio culture and those of the Annangs, Oros, Efiks and other Ibibio groups, please buy and read Ibibio Nation: History & Culture.  

Keywords: Curious, Reasons for divorce, Ibibio Marriage, Culture, History

DIVORCE AMONG THE IBIBIO PEOPLE | PART A | IBOM HERITAGE

The topic of divorce among the Ibibio people is treated in Oto-Obong Uwah’s book “Ibibio Nation: History & Culture” (Buy here). This article draws from the book largely.

Although western culture seems to have overrun our traditions largely, there is need to recall how our fathers treated these aspects of social life. Why not when we can find today’s lessons to draw from our original culture?

In the general African culture, divorce is acceptable when the wife was guilty of adultery or witchcraft. But in the Ibibio culture specifically, reasons for divorce go beyond just witchcraft and adultery.

In this article, we discuss 4 reasons the Ibibios allowed divorce;

Infertility:

One of the major reasons for divorce in Ibibio land was an inability to bear children. They would ask; if you can’t bear children why did we marry you?  If the wife fails to conceive a child, she is considered barren and this will almost certainly lead to the termination of that marriage.

Child mortality:

In the past, child mortality was relatively high. Without waiting to know all possible causes, the society did blame the mother for frequent loss of her own children. They would blame her for being unable to nurture and care for her children. And when this happened, the man could divorce his wife if he wished.

Insult on Parents:

When the wife insults the parents of her husband, especially the mother-in-law, it could lead to a divorce. To penalize the act, elders would slam the offending wife with a fine of a he-goat.

Theft:

Ibibio people considered theft as such a shameful act that they punished the culprit severely. If a wife was caught stealing, her husband could divorce her for bringing shame on his family.

We wrote more on curious reasons for divorce in the Ibibio culture. Read it here.

Keywords: Marriage, Ibibio, Akwa Ibom, Divorce in Ibibio Culture

Ekpo Society – Types and Arms | Part 3 | Ibom Heritage

Ekpo society is a large one characterized by many arms. It is even safe to consider them as different types although they are all ‘Ekpo’. We had published other articles on the Ekpo society. Please click here and here.

Ekpo nyòhó

Costumed in a manner to scare women and children once they were seen, Ekpo nyòhó is mainly found deep in the core Ibibio area of Uyo -Ibesikpo – Nsit Ubium – Etinan axis. When the masquerade appears, it is dressed in black furry raffia that gives it a round amorphous shape. With a terrifying face, a sharp machete in hand and some green symbolic leaves, this masquerade is a handful.
This arm was responsible for orderliness and made sure that laws made were carried out on all administrative levels in Ibibio Land.

Ekpo Ndòk

Ibibio people considered this particular Ekpo as the actual ghost. It came out at night and majorly to penalize crimes committed in secrecy. It was considered to be fair and impartial, and hovered around the community unseen.

Ekpo Eko’on

This arm of the Ekpo society had its operations between June and August yearly and was known for bringing calm on the community. Whenever Ekpo Eko’on was out, the community will be quiet as everyone will be on automatic holidays.

Traders were not required to come late from their businesses, nor farmers to return late from their farms. In riverine areas, the same rule applied to fishermen. And then in colonial days when the civil service was birthed, workers knew better than to be found outdoors when the Ekpo was out.

Eka Ekpo

This was considered the mother of the Ekpo masquerade. It had a lot of respect accorded it. Before it emerged for a march, a display, a timeout for whatever purpose, every member of the community was informed. In some communities, you may be allowed to view it from your homes. In others, no one was to see it but the initiates.

Ekpo ntok-ayen

This was the teen Ekpo, worn by young people. It was strictly for entertainment and could be on display at any time or season, but especially during yuletide when travelers returned home to spend time with family. Its costume is usually of white painted raffia and the mask would be friendly, handsome, playful, anything but scary.

Get the book ‘Ibibio Nation: History & Culture’ by Oto-Obong Uwah via this link.

Written by Brownson Nseime, from Jabborro PR

Keywords: Ekpo society types, arms | classes | Ibibio

More Interesting Facts About Ekpo Society (Part B)

The Ekpo society is an interesting part of Akwa Ibom culture. Although colonialism watered down the substance of these aspects of our culture, we have managed to retain some of it. Read on to learn more interesting facts about the Ekpo society.

There is the first part to this particular article, which you can get by clicking here.

Did Ekpo Have Supernatural Powers?

In recent times, the Ekpo masquerade has been more of a cultural display that hits the streets during important occasions. It is also mostly on demand and during end of year ‘ukapadisua’ (ukapisua) celebrations.

As with masquerades in other parts of black Africa, the use of magic does get engaged in Ekpo displays. Although this has been merely for entertainment, those powers still show up when hostile groups meet during simultaneous festivals.

There is nothing unique about the feature of magical powers in Ekpo festivals. It is just like masquerades and cultural plays you find in other parts of Sub-Saharan Africa, especially among Bantu and sub-Bantu tribes. Magical powers are an integral part of the culture. But there is hardly any hard proof of these powers being channeled into harm.

However, as western civilisation continues to sip deeper into the cultures of the land, the uncanny reduces in display. This is why, to witness the supernatural powers of the Ekpo play, one would have to attend Ekpo festivals in the inner recesses of rural Ibibio communities.

Ekpo Has A Home 

The Ekpo, considered originally to be a ghost, had a figurative place of abode given to it by the community. This place was treated as sacred because it was thought to haven the spirits of dead ancestors and other dead members of the cult who were buried there.

This ‘abode’ was in a forest and was out of bounds for women and children. If a woman or child or non-initiate wandered into this part of the forest, there were.  However, as Western culture arrived, locations like these became increasingly open to members of the community.

The Ekpo Cultural Display

As with other African cultures, including the ones exported to other parts of the world through the trans-Atlantic slave trade, Ekpo has always had its cultural showing featuring its own distinctive masquerade known by the costume and mask. It also has its drum music comprised of the tone, rhythm and accompanying The display also has its drum music is also indicative of the Ekpo display. This is about the only aspects of the society that still feature in the Ekpo phenomenon.

When an Ekpo Society Member Dies

After the death of a member of the Ekpo society, there are sacrifices to the gods. These practices do involve a lot of secrecy. The items used for sacrifice are not made known publicly, although there is talk of human sacrifice in the distant past.

At the funeral ceremony, on the day of the burial event, Ekpo masquerades appeared with all sorts of performance amidst fanfare and feasting.

The society, community and family of the deceased do all these before they lower the corpse into the grave as a mark of  respect to the dead member.

How About These Days?

Back in the day, the consequences for violating movement restrictions could be dire. You could be flogged, you could be detained depending on the arm of Ekpo or other society you ran into. The violent manner of enforcing rules using these cultural societies like the Ekpo group was increasingly frowned at as Ibibio culture mixed with English civilization.

These days, within Urban areas of Akwa Ibom State and Calabar, the activities of the Ekpo society have been severely curbed. The violent aspects have almost all together been ended, especially in the city centres. But there are corners of rural areas where these practices remain rife.

Get the book ‘Ibibio Nation: History & Culture’ by Oto-Obong Uwah via this link.

Written by Brownson Nseime, from Jabborro PR

Ekpo Society – What You Need to Know (Part A)

The Ekpo society is one of the foremost secret societies in the Ibibio society. ‘Ekpo’ means ‘ghost of an ancestor’ literally. As a cultural society of the same name, the Ibibios framed Ekpo as a law enforcement society in the cultural setting. More specifically, Ekpo society was an instrument for managing ancient Ibibio society and up to early post-colonial times.

Most of the famous men of the Ibibio society were members of the Ekpo society. Some were chiefs, some family heads, some youth leaders.

This group was so effective that the community held them in high regard. Non-initiates, women and children held them in great fear also.

Was the Ekpo a job?

The Ekpo members met in what we call ‘Afé Ekpo’, the Ekpo tent or meeting hall. Here, they made decisions that were binding on all members of the community. Since members were mostly leaders of the land, this was a major decision making forum.

The Ekpo also performed formal functions in historical Ibibio society. It ensured that the community carried out judicial verdicts to the letter. You can call them police of the precolonial era.

Ekpo was and is never an occupation, but simply a socio-cultural concept handed from ancestral Ibibio. Masqueraders were and are your usual everyday member of the community who is an initiate. They did not play ‘ekpo’ for daily bread in time past. Recently though, masqueraders have infused collection of cash appreciation into the displays – as an entertainment.

Did Ekpo Have Supernatural Powers?

In recent times, the Ekpo masquerade has been more of a cultural display that hits the streets during important cultural occasions, on demand and during the end of year ‘ukapadisua’ (ukapisua) celebrations.

As with masquerades in other parts of black Africa, the use of magic does get engaged in Ekpo displays. Although this has been merely for fun than for any other motive. Whether the magical powers can be channeled into something harmful is topic for some other research.

Get the book ‘Ibibio Nation: History & Culture’ by Oto-Obong Uwah via this link.

Written by Brownson Nseime, from Jabborro PR

How to Marry Your Ibibio Girlfriend | Part 2

We had earlier written about how to marry your Ibibio girlfriend; the first phases in getting married to your Ibibio girlfriend. Read that here. In this follow-up article, we bring you the remaining stages in the traditional Ibibio marriage process. Please read and share. Who knows, some ‘esen owo’ who has fallen in love with your sister may need it.

Nkòñ Udòk – Knocking the Door

This stage is very critical stage in the whole process of marrying in Ibibio land. At this stage, your family members escort you to the lady’s family.

Basically in theory, the ‘Knocking’ simply means enquiring formally for the availability of the girl and confirming the willingness of the family to release her to your family. This is where you hear the incoming family use the adage; “we have seen a beautiful flower in your yard and will like to pluck it and take home to ours”.

At this stage also, the process does not require your family head. He can send his representative and a delegation.

One important question you will also hear at this point is; “Nso’o ke adi?” This means; “what are you here for”.

Affirm and reaffirm your reason for the journey. You will get an applause and then will become eligible for the next stage.

The family will decide whether to issue you their marriage list or to ask you to come back for it. Since Ibibios are naturally easy going people, they will most likely not want you to go through the stress of travelling in too many times. They would have prepared the list before this point and would just hand it to you or the eldest man in the visiting party.

Items required at this stage for traditional rites may include; a bottle of strong drink, pods of kola, assorted fruits etc.

Following this event will be a meeting to negotiate the list. This article does not include negotiation of list as a formal stage in the marriage process because you can skip it. If you can afford the items on the list, why negotiate?

How Not To Marry Ibibio Girls: A Stupid Thing You Could Do

If you ask the girl’s family, “Please, when is the wedding date”, you have goofed big time.

Traditional Engagement (MbɅb)

When you are done with the list, the next stage is the formal betrothal of the prospective bride to the prospective groom in the presence of both families. It is called ‘mbɅb’ because it is the actual ‘request’ occasion. From this point, you are now betrothed to the lady according to the Ibibio tradition.

It is usually a celebration, although strictly on invitation. It is also the moment when you present the items on the marriage list.

Usòrò Ndò – Marriage Festival or Traditional Marriage

This is when the family gives your their daughter in the traditional sense. After now, you can leave with your wife. It is a festival, a celebration of families, community members and visitors.

Some Stupid Things You Can Do

This is a festival with its own dramas. If you even slightly show disgust at any of the dramas, you have embarrassed the entire community of the bride. Another stupid thing you can do is to see the lady before they bring her out. The family can fine you,  and that would still be on a lighter note.

Notice that there are traditions in the Ibibio marriage process that are no longer in practice. One is the ‘Mboppo’ practice where elderly women pass a girl who has a suitor through fattening, circumcision and display at the market. Some of these practices that were adjudged harmful to health had to be suspended by present day Ibibio cultures. In fact, in today’s Ibibio land, once a young man and a maiden have agreed to get married and the families agree, everything else is fanfare.

Keywords: How to marry an Ibibio girl

How To Marry An Ibibio Girl – The Initial Traditional Process | Ibibio Marriage

In Ibibio land, marriage is beyond the fusion of 2 individuals; it brings families and communities together. This is the case in many African and West-Asian cultures. But if you are a bachelor courting an Ibibio damsel, or your son is the bachelor, this article explains how to marry that Ibibio girl. It details the traditions you need to be aware of.

Drop Your Pride!

Firstly, you must know that Ibibio people take a strong exception to being treated with disrespect. If your Ibibio girlfriend lets you pass, her dad, uncles, elder brothers will almost certainly not allow you approach their door with superiority complex. If you manage to brush past them, you could get yourself into trouble. Trouble that physical science may never understand.

One of the worst hindrances you would meet in getting married into an Ibibio family has to do with your proud defiance of the Ibibio culture. It can cost you more than you could imagine.

There is the story of a woman from a community between Uyo and Ikot Ekpene who could not conceive until her husband went back to fulfil all marriage rites that he had arrogantly skipped.

Do not sit in Lagos or even in nearby Port Harcourt and assume you know all about the Ibibio culture. Or that ‘nothing dey happen’. Drop your pride and let the girl’s family show you what to do.

Udioño Ufòk – Knowing the Family

This is the first stage in the actual process of marriage. At this stage the prospective groom goes in the company of his best friend or close associate to visit the father of the girl. Beware of how you visit her father’s house while you are just a suitor. If you have not decided to marry her and cleared with your own family, don’t ask to meet her dad during visits. And when she has cleared you and your family is on board the project, take some gift (with wine inclusive), take a good friend of yours along and schedule a time to go see her father or his representative.

3 Stupid Things You can Do in an Ibibio Marriage:

If you go with a female friend or sister, that’s stupid. Or you tell her dad “I only came to say hi”; or you go alone, you just did something stupid.

During this visit, you will be questioned by her father. He will ask what you do, your religion and your family history.

This is also the opportunity you have to get familiar with the direction to the lady’s home. This is true especially if the dad invites you to his family compound, not just his own built resident – which, may be away from his ancestral home.

No formal demands are made on the groom at this first stage but courtesy demands that you carry a bottle of aromatic schnapps. If the family does not accept alcoholic drinks, carry a non-alcoholic wine.

Click here to know the other Ibibio marriage stages…

Click here to get Oto-Obong Uwah’s book; ‘Ibibio Nation: History & Culture’.

Keywords: Ibibio Marriage; How to marry an Ibibio Damsel

Oto-Obong Uwah

Oto-Obong Uwah

Oto-Obong Aniefiok Uwah is the author of Ibibio Nation: History and Culture. He represents the new generation of Philosopher-Kings who believe in the unfailing strength of the human capacity to change every contrary situation. A highly motivated individual, he also plies his social trade in public speaking, coaching and mentoring.

He holds a BSC in Accounting from the University of Uyo and an MSC in International Accounting & Finance from the University of Liverpool. In his career, spanning over 19 years as an accountant and budget/cost analyst in the public and private sectors, he has developed a robust aptitude for analytical reviews and cost management towards efficient project delivery; having practiced as a Trainee Accountant with the Federal Civil Service and Cost Controller in the Oil & Gas Sector.

In actualizing various roles within this professional context, he built capacity and mentored other professionals in those roles. Currently an HR Compensation and Benefits professional, Oto-Obong has used his experience as an active labour unionist to push reforms that have led to a fairer welfare and compensation structure within the workplace.

Currently an HR Compensation and Benefits professional, Oto-Obong has used his experience as an active labour unionist to push reforms that have led to a fairer welfare and compensation structure within the workplace.

Oto-Obong Uwah is a Fellow of the Institute of Chartered Accountants of Nigeria (ICAN). He is widely trained on both local and international platforms, enhancing his professional capacity towards improved service delivery.

 

He is a poet, writer, political scientist, public commentator, sports enthusiast, and an accomplished humanist. His latest foray as a humanist is in the field of anthropology and heritage studies, committed to the propagation of the Nigerian cultural heritage.   

Oto-Obong Uwah is of the Pentecostal section of the Christian community, happily married and blessed with three beautiful daughters. As a philanthropist, he has teamed up with his beloved wife to sponsor scores of indigent Nigerians through various levels of education. He is a very sociable person and an astute networker, easily found in the company of smart and intelligent people.

His life’s dream is the consistent improvement of humanity and the continued development of the social eco-system to make for a more fulfilling life for all. Driven by this mantra, he set out in 2015, to document the history of his Atan Offot Community in Uyo Local Government Area of Akwa Ibom State. What started as a clan-centered ambition to document the history of a small community created the pathway to a more expansive research that evolved to produce the book shared with the public today. Thus, Ibibio Nation: History and Culture is one of his modest contributions to the current global interest in the history and sociology of ethnic minorities.